Long Overdue

Ok so it’s been quite a while since I’ve posted. Classes, traveling, poor internet connection and just general laziness were all equally contributing factors. In any event...

Can I Live?

Long term stays in a foreign environment usually follow a typical pattern. It goes something like: Honeymoon Phase → Hostile Phase → Home Phase. I’m missing a few steps, but the general idea is that at first you fall in love with the newness and beauty of wherever it is you find yourself, but eventually you start to get frustrated with some of the cultural differences, homesickness etc. Finally, you acclimate yourself to your environment and start to feel at home. The time frame for each of these steps isn’t the same for everyone. My Honeymoon lasted about two weeks and I was almost immediately projected into the Hostility Phase and truthfully, I haven’t really exited. But my Hostility isn’t the same Hostility that others have experienced. I'm not angry or homesick at all (thank God). I just find myself repeatedly and rhetorically asking Ghana, “Can I live?”

Everywhere we go it’s like there is a huge neon sign over our heads that says OBRUNI! It doesn’t seem to matter if I’m walking down the same road I walk down every day to get to school or if I’m traveling to a different neighborhood, it’s the same foreigner-different-obruni-whatyoudoinghere?-interesting look that you get. It get’s old fast. I think that maybe my experience is especially different because (apparently) I stand out more because I have an eyebrow piercing, females don’t usually have dreads around here, and I’m very obviously not Ghanaian. Which I don’t have a problem with. Also, apparently I'm Queen Latifah. 

I beg to differ. 

I don’t mind looking American. After all, I am from America. I just don’t like being reminded of it everywhere I go. Sometimes it translates into genuine interest and conversation, but the vast majority of it is just awkward stares and looks everywhere I go. I want to make a t-shirt that says “STOP STARING AT ME!” Either that or “I AM NOT A RASTA!” That pretty much sums it up. Can I live? Can I just walk down the street? Can I just do me? One thing that I have learned to appreciate about living in NYC is the diversity. Everyone is different; so no one is different. Ghana, like anywhere in the world, has its ups and its downs. My main down is the otherness that never seems to leave me. Not now nor will I ever try to be Ghanaian. I’m not from Ghana and I’m cool with that. I don’t want to necessarily be a Ghanaian. I just wish I got more positive or even indifferent vibes about my otherness. I understand that I am different here and apparently an anomaly of some sort, but in the midst of all of this cultural exchange, I’m still getting started at everywhere I go. I just want to live my life. [cue TI f/ Rihanna ‘Live Your Life’]

The Real World: Ghana | Release Therapy

I couldn’t decide between titling this post The Real World: Ghana or Release Therapy because it’s a combination of the two. Let me explain.

I thought Release Therapy would be a good look for this post because I was feeling like I needed to find a way to cope with all these emotions, thoughts, and revelations that were coming from living in Ghana so far. I’ve learned a lot about the world and even more about myself. It’s been such a blessing being away from home and everything that is familiar to me. I was reluctant to go at first because I didn’t know anyone in the program and I would be so far away for so long, but I can see now that it was the best thing for me. 

I had put a lot of pressure on myself without even knowing it. Before I left I just knew that I would learn this and learn that. See this and see that. Feel this and feel that. It wasn’t until I just stopped and told myself to exhale. Released all of those preconceived expectations. I took the pressure off myself and just let me feel whatever I was intended to feel. Never mind what people at home expect you to be doing, seeing, or feeling. I know all of this may be kind of ambiguous if you’ve never traveled abroad for a long period of time, but it makes perfect sense to me. It wasn’t until I just relaxed and started to appreciate my feelings and experiences for what they were that I really started to enjoy my time here overall. Embrace the experiences, good and bad. Whether you’re frustrated, stressed, annoyed, bored or whatever, be honest with yourself. That is what you are feeling. Start to deal with that in itself rather than trying to make your experience into something it may not be intended to be. That was pretty much the conversation that I had with myself about a month ago and since then, things have gone a lot more smoothly.

So I’ve decided that NYU Study Abroad in Ghana needs to be renamed The Real World: Ghana. 

This is the true story... of 43 Americans... picked to move to West Africa...live together and have their lives changed... find out what happens... when people stop being polite... and start getting real...The Real World: Ghana. 

So actually there are two dorms and I’m not sure how many of us are on the trip, but it is The Real World: Ghana. Minus the camera crew.

I’ve always felt that the point of The RW was more about the people than the actual place that they were staying in. Of course The RW Las Vegas was way different than The RW Denver and the show obviously takes on the characteristics of its location, but it’s the people that make the show, not the place. Most of what I am learning and loving about Ghana comes from the people on the trip with me. Which I did not expect. We are all Americans, mostly from NYU, but from all over the country and with all different backgrounds. I have met some of the funniest, most creative, most interesting people in my life here. I’m definitely going back to NY with more than I left with.

Most of The RW shows are filmed in the house. The show is designed to almost force people to interact and conflict. There haven’t been any real brawls, drunken knife fights, or controversial hook-ups. (At least none that are blog worthy). We spend a lot of time together because I think that people are integrating themselves in Ghana at different degrees. The obruni thing in combination with it just being oppressively hot all the time kind of forces people indoors a lot. We spend a lot of time together or in our rooms, watch a lot of movies, plenty of good conversations etc. Some people have made really good friends outside the program and sometimes they come over to the houses which is cool. People have internships and community service and classes at other schools so we do actively involve ourselves in the world outside our dorms. But all in all, the program serves as more of a home base than I thought it would.  

No Place Like Home: Black to Africa

I wish I was art-sy enough to make a well put together documentary with the above title. It would basically be about what it’s like being a part of the African Diaspora and coming back to Africa. Maybe I will. If I can get my hands on a camera. And some talent. We’ll see.

bebini = black person